Me (Inside Voice), volume 1

COWORKER: So you're going to be gone for two and a half weeks, eh? How'd you pull that off?
ME (OUT LOUD): Well, I already had the trip planned before I started here.
COWORKER: Yeah, I'm surprised that they let you take that much time off. I didn't think you could take that much time off all at once.
ME (OUT LOUD): Yeah, I think management realized that it made sense for me to take it all at once in this case.
(moment of silence)
COWORKER: Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's company policy that you can't take two weeks off all at once.
ME (INSIDE VOICE): Hey, it's really bothering you that I'm doing something that isn't to the letter of the law, isn't it? It's almost as if I realize that they're company guidelines, not laws. Especially when you consider that I just told you that management allowed me to take the time off, one can only presume that you have no idea what the fuck you're talking about. I might go so far as to say that there might be reasons why they're management and you're not.

Now that I think about it, this blind obedience to the company guidelines may be one of the reasons why I'm above you in the pecking order despite being half your age. So as much as your twelve years of thankless has gotten you in this company, the fact that I'm getting what I want and you aren't might be an indication that the company actually prefers people who think for themselves instead of just grumbling at their desk about how everyone else is trying to destroy you. Now go back to complaining about your job (and, evidently, complaining about everyone else's job as well) and I'll get back to actually doing mine. If my apparently insubordination bothers you that much, look at the bright side: I'll be gone within a year, moving further up the chain or promoting out, while you will remain, wasting away at your desk until you die. I apologize in advance for the next future management who replaces me and continues to ruin your life by flaunting the rules, right in your face. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going on vacation. I'll be back in two and a half weeks.